Long time, no update. I'm not so good at this blog thing. Nevertheless, I'm trying… bear with me!
Tonight I'm absolutely bursting with excitement. On Sunday, I went to a Natural Family Planning class to observe. I'm training to become an instructor. I am so excited about this! You probably think I'm crazy, but the more I've learned about NFP the more I want to share it with others. I feel that it's amazing in so many ways and on so many levels! Our bodies are truly amazing, God-given gifts and NFP helps reveal the beauty of our bodies every day. In my journey to become an instructor, I've had to defend NFP to a few. Some think I'm a "religious nut." However, if you look at the history, foundation, and practice of NFP you'll see that it's really a beautiful way of living out married love.
A fun fact I learned recently is that until the 1930s, all Christian Churches believed contraception (oral pills, condoms, etc.) to be gravely immoral—and for good reason! The Anglican Church was the first to allow the use of contraception for "serious reasons" and, well, you know where we are now. However, I believe that a careful examination of the ways in which contraceptives work reveals the wisdom in the original teachings of the Christian faith—and that which the Roman Catholic Church still upholds. The pill, for example, works in three ways: 1.) it suppresses ovulation (some to most of the time—not 100%), 2.) it thickens cervical mucus to impede the transmission of sperm to an available egg, and 3.) it alters the endometrium (the uterine lining where a fertilized embryo—a human life with unique DNA—implants after conception) so that implantation of a fertilized egg (embryo) is nearly impossible. Let's deal with the first two mechanisms together. By suppressing fertility by decreasing chances of ovulation and sperm travelling to the fallopian tubes, one directly interferes with God's plan. That's not to say that a married couple has to try to conceive a child at every opportunity. However, if we are called to be open to God's will in our lives, in all aspects of our lives, how can we rightly lock the door of fertility to God's plan? It's like saying to God, "Lord, I trust you in every part of my life—except when it comes to deciding how many children I should have. I think I'll take this pill (use this condom, spermicide, whatever) just to be safe so that I can make that decision all on my own." Not only does it shut out God, but also it blocks the full union of married spouses from giving to each other 100% in the "marital embrace." Our trust in God should be absolute and total, as our love for our spouse should be unconditional and complete—all aspects of our personhood—including our fertility. The third mechanism of contraception—the alteration of the endometrium—is tantamount to abortion if you accept that life begins at conception. Period. By taking a medication to willfully prevent the implantation of an embryo (a baby), one rejects the new life which God created. Unfortunately, many women don't realize that effect of the pill (I didn't until I researched it myself—and I'm a Registered Nurse!). The medical and pharmaceutical communities do not advertise that effect. They tend to focus on the first mechanism of the pill—suppression of ovulation and regulation of menstrual cycles—for their sales pitches. After reflecting about contraceptives, especially the pill, it's logical and clear to me why the Church has remained firm on her stance against contraception. It simply is contradictory to God's plan for us. He wants better for us—a married life that is completely giving to one another as spouses, potentially life giving, and completely trusting in His Wisdom and His Plan for us.
So where does NFP fit in? To some, it seems to some to be a "Catholic" loophole—"Catholic contraception," if you will. However, that simply isn't the case! NFP provides us knowledge of our bodies as God intended them to be to work in communion with God and His Plan for us to strive for responsible parenthood. Responsible parents wouldn't buy a million dollar house on a $50,000 a year salary no more than they would try to have 15 children on that same salary. Neither choice is responsible in most situations. However, through the beauty of NFP, married couples can discern every month what is the most responsible action—abstinence during the fertile phase of the woman's cycle, or to engage in marital relations and being explicitly open to new life. Either way, the couple prayerfully discerns what God is calling them to do—together. What other form of "birth control" brings a couple together in communication about God's Plan for their marriage? I can't think of any other. What a beautiful expression of Faith and Trust in God when a married couple can openly discuss their sex life and plan for their family; unselfishly taking into account personal needs, the needs of the couple, and the needs of the family.
The last thing I really love about NFP is that it is empowering to both women and men! NFP helps women to understand the beauty of her body—the way God made it. So many women think something is wrong or they have some kind of disease or infection when really they are experiencing the normal changes that occur with hormone fluctuations throughout the menstrual cycle. NFP empowers women to know their bodies and understand their fertility signs, which therefore allows them to be active participants in managing their family. In contrast, contraception that forces women to alter their fertility to conform to some people's ideas of "normal" family size or the "right time" to have a baby, or [insert excuse], seems, to me, oppressive. Being chained to a pack of pills hardly seems liberating when you think about it that way. In a similar way, it empowers men because as men learn NFP with their spouse, they come to understand the beauty of her cycle and the special gift and responsibility of their combined fertility. What greater gentleman is there than one who can appreciate all aspects of his bride, even her "mysterious" menstrual cycle?
The more I've learned about NFP the more proud I am of the
Holy Catholic Church for standing up for women, for married love, and for submission to God's plan by condemning contraception for all that it is—a rejection of God's Will in the most intimate part of our lives. The more I've learned, the more I want to share with others. Pray for me as I continue on my journey to become an instructor for this God given, scientifically validated, empowering means of planning your family with God.
